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CRISTINA

She is black.  She is foreign.  She is intelligent.  She is tough. She is a Structural Engineer.  She doesn't drive. She doesn't like Hollywood.

 

 

 

 

FOUNTAIN
Fountain is just your average Hollywood executive.  He is, quite simply, an asshole.  He has won four Cockskers.  If he were to stop breathing forever, would the world miss him?  Not bloody likely!

 

 

 

GOWER

Another executive, a few years older than Fountain.  Once upon a time he had been a manager of a fast food restaurant, a perfect precursor to Hollywood Executive.

 

 

 

WILCOX

The biggest movie star in the world, and the biggest ego.  He can, quite literally, do anything he wants and no one can touch him. 

 

 

 

COLE
 

 

A recent film school graduate.  Just like thousands of others, his holy graille is to be just like Steven Spielberg, but can he kiss up to assholes for several years to earn his place in the sun?

 

 

 

 

 

 

GARDNER
 
A tired screenwriter.  He has seen too much.  His wisdom is a liability.  He knows there is no escape from Hollywood.

 

 

 

 

ARGYLE
 
A sleazy, but nice, talent agent.  He is basically the first face many young hopefuls see after reaching Hollywood.  If they are lucky, he leads them into the wonderful world of porn.

 

 

 

 

 

 

MARATHON & CRESCENT

Two worn out porn actors. He just wants a chance to act and she wants to breath fresh air.

 

 

SPACEMAN
 
A PR representative for Wormwood Studio.  He was once abducted by aliens.  Now, after returning with psychic abilities, his special talents are greatly admired in tinsel town.

 

 

 

 

 

 

BEVERLY
 
A typical Hollywood secretary.  She will do anything to keep Fountain, her boss, happy. 

 

 

 

MARY BETH COURTNEY
 
An evil casting director (I am being redundant).  She uses men.  She hates men.  She uses women.  She hates women.  Of course, she has every right to do so.  She has earned it. 

 

 

 

OGDEN & SEWARD
 
The classic Assistant Director (A.D.), with his trusted toady trainee.  He is distrustful of foreigners.  He hates blacks, women, Jews, homosexuals, and the government, not necessarily in that order.  He is very disciplined.  He is very good at his job.

 

 

 

POINSETTIA
 
Hope springs eternal for an aging wannabe movie star.  She will do anything to succeed.  Anything.

 

 

 

 

 

MR. FAIRFAX
 
The head of Wormwood Studios.  A man of mystery.  Does he really exist?  How does he choose winners so consistently?